Breaking the Cycle of Insecurity, Anxiety, and Depression
Do you know that we all deal with insecurity to one degree or another? And our insecurities can produce wrong attitudes and actions, which can lead to conflict.
What does it mean to be insecure? Insecurity is a form of fear and anxiety. A person who is insecure feels vulnerable or threatened by a real or perceived danger. When a person feels threatened, whether by people or circumstances, they can experience fear and/or anxiety. Often, insecurity is experienced because of circumstances that are beyond one’s control.
It’s important to note that not all fear is bad. It’s helpful to think of fear in two ways:
If your child runs into the street, protective fear will rise up in your heart and propel you to rescue your child from real danger. But then there’s another kind of fear—a paralyzing fear that can hold us back from moving forward into a job promotion or starting a ministry because of fear of the unknown.
How do we overcome the fear and anxiety in our lives that makes us insecure, that keeps us from progressing in life, and damages our relationships?
In Proverbs 12:25, we find wise instructions for an anxious heart: “Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs him down, but a good word makes him glad.â€
I’ve heard it said that anxiety has a twin and her name is depression. When you’re in a constant state of anxiety or worry, as Proverbs 12:25 indicates, you will be weighed down. That is, you will be depressed. It’s been said that the body and soul are so interconnected that sometimes they catch each other’s diseases. Anxiety and depression will literally drain us of the physical and emotional energy that we need to be at our best.
When we’re depressed we also have a tendency of making mountains out of molehills. When we are weighed down by worry, which is also often rooted in imagining the worst case scenario, we can lose motivation or even want to quit. It’s been wisely suggested that we should not make major decisions when we are depressed or tired. This is wise because often our depression is connected to anxiety which is rooted in false assumptions about ourselves or the future.
What’s more, depression weighs us down. It drains emotional energy and motivation. This is not a place to be making major decisions. Emotions are great followers, but terrible leaders. Our decision should be ultimately based on faith, not feelings. Moreover, our faith should be informed by the word of God, by His truth, not our emotionally skewed perceptions.
With this in mind, notice the wise instruction that Proverbs 12:25 gives for anxiety in the heart of man which weighs them down: “but a good word makes him glad.â€
How does a good word lift us up when we are down and discouraged? Often what fuels our depression are anxious thoughts. To change how we feel, we have to change the way we think. Discouragement is often a temporary loss of an eternal perspective. The good word that can change the way we think and overcome the lies we may be believing is God’s word. And God’s word is something that we must learn to preach to ourselves. When David, the sweet Psalmist of Israel, was down and depressed, he wrote:
We see here that when David was down, he began to question and speak to his own soul. Moreover, he identified the root cause of his depressed state. He had his eyes on the problems in his life. When our circumstances cause us to be anxious, insecure, and depressed, we need to change the focus of our thoughts. We need to glimpse at our problems, but gaze at our God. He’s our hope and our salvation. We need to remind ourselves of who God is and who we are as His children.
If you’re saved, Christ is now your identity — that’s what it means for us to be Christians! Not what other people think of you. You are who God says you are. In Christ we are born again. We are a new creation. The Old has passed and all has been made new. (2 Cor. 5:17)
Have we sinned and sinned greatly? In Christ “we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins†(Colossians 1:14).
Do we feel like orphans, strangers, and aliens? In Christ we have been adopted by God to be his children and are now members of his household and heirs of all things with Christ (Ephesians 1:5; 2:19; Romans 8:17).
Do we feel like miserable failures? In Christ, almost incredibly, every failure will work for an ultimate good (Romans 8:28).
Do we feel weak and inadequate? In Christ God loves to choose the weak and foolish things because, when we are weak, he promises that his grace will be sufficient for us — so much so that we can learn to boast in our weaknesses because of how they showcase his strength (1 Corinthians 1:27–31; 2 Corinthians 12:9–10)
Do we feel insignificant and unimportant? In Christ we were chosen by God (John 15:16), who purposefully assigned us a unique and needed function in his body (1 Corinthians 12:18).
When we are anxious and depressed, we need a good word, we need God’s word, we need the good new of Jesus. More than that, we need to get our eyes on the God of the word and worship Him. Fear will turn to faith when worry turns to worship.
In His service,
Pastor Marco
“When people are insecure, they can express it in very different ways, depending on their temperament, values, and conditioned habits, all often shaped by past experiences. In some, insecurity looks like meekness, compliance, and always assuming blame. In others, it looks like bravado, defiance, and never admitting wrong. In one person, insecurity moves them to avoid attention if at all possible; in another, it moves them to demand as much attention as possible†(Jon Bloom)
What does it mean to be insecure? Insecurity is a form of fear and anxiety. A person who is insecure feels vulnerable or threatened by a real or perceived danger. When a person feels threatened, whether by people or circumstances, they can experience fear and/or anxiety. Often, insecurity is experienced because of circumstances that are beyond one’s control.
It’s important to note that not all fear is bad. It’s helpful to think of fear in two ways:
There’s a protective fear that’s designed by God to motivate us to take protective action. And there is a paralyzing fear that is not of God and leads to inaction or the wrong actions.
If your child runs into the street, protective fear will rise up in your heart and propel you to rescue your child from real danger. But then there’s another kind of fear—a paralyzing fear that can hold us back from moving forward into a job promotion or starting a ministry because of fear of the unknown.
How do we overcome the fear and anxiety in our lives that makes us insecure, that keeps us from progressing in life, and damages our relationships?
In Proverbs 12:25, we find wise instructions for an anxious heart: “Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs him down, but a good word makes him glad.â€
I’ve heard it said that anxiety has a twin and her name is depression. When you’re in a constant state of anxiety or worry, as Proverbs 12:25 indicates, you will be weighed down. That is, you will be depressed. It’s been said that the body and soul are so interconnected that sometimes they catch each other’s diseases. Anxiety and depression will literally drain us of the physical and emotional energy that we need to be at our best.
When we’re depressed we also have a tendency of making mountains out of molehills. When we are weighed down by worry, which is also often rooted in imagining the worst case scenario, we can lose motivation or even want to quit. It’s been wisely suggested that we should not make major decisions when we are depressed or tired. This is wise because often our depression is connected to anxiety which is rooted in false assumptions about ourselves or the future.
What’s more, depression weighs us down. It drains emotional energy and motivation. This is not a place to be making major decisions. Emotions are great followers, but terrible leaders. Our decision should be ultimately based on faith, not feelings. Moreover, our faith should be informed by the word of God, by His truth, not our emotionally skewed perceptions.
With this in mind, notice the wise instruction that Proverbs 12:25 gives for anxiety in the heart of man which weighs them down: “but a good word makes him glad.â€
How does a good word lift us up when we are down and discouraged? Often what fuels our depression are anxious thoughts. To change how we feel, we have to change the way we think. Discouragement is often a temporary loss of an eternal perspective. The good word that can change the way we think and overcome the lies we may be believing is God’s word. And God’s word is something that we must learn to preach to ourselves. When David, the sweet Psalmist of Israel, was down and depressed, he wrote:
“Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation and my God. My soul is cast down within me; therefore I remember you…â€Psalm 42:5-6
We see here that when David was down, he began to question and speak to his own soul. Moreover, he identified the root cause of his depressed state. He had his eyes on the problems in his life. When our circumstances cause us to be anxious, insecure, and depressed, we need to change the focus of our thoughts. We need to glimpse at our problems, but gaze at our God. He’s our hope and our salvation. We need to remind ourselves of who God is and who we are as His children.
Jon Bloom writes, “Believe it or not, insecurity is not only a warning; it’s also an invitation. When we feel insecure, God is inviting us to escape the danger of false beliefs about who we are, why we’re here, what we should do, and what we’re worth, and to find peaceful refuge in what he says about all those things. The more we understand the gospel of Jesus Christ, the more we find it is the end of insecurity — not the perfect end in this age, but the increasing and ultimate end.â€
If you’re saved, Christ is now your identity — that’s what it means for us to be Christians! Not what other people think of you. You are who God says you are. In Christ we are born again. We are a new creation. The Old has passed and all has been made new. (2 Cor. 5:17)
As the great British speaker, Martyn Lloyd Jones, observed: “Have you realized that most of your unhappiness in life is due to the fact that you are listening to yourself instead of talking to yourself? Take those thoughts that come to you the moment you wake up in the morning. You have not originated them but they are talking to you, they bring back the problems of yesterday, etc. Somebody is talking. Who is talking to you? Your self is talking to you. Now this man’s treatment [in Psalm 42] was this: instead of allowing this self to talk to him, he starts talking to himself. “Why art thou cast down, O my soul?†he asks. His soul had been depressing him, crushing him. So he stands up and says, “Self, listen for moment, I will speak to you.â€
Have we sinned and sinned greatly? In Christ “we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins†(Colossians 1:14).
Do we feel like orphans, strangers, and aliens? In Christ we have been adopted by God to be his children and are now members of his household and heirs of all things with Christ (Ephesians 1:5; 2:19; Romans 8:17).
Do we feel like miserable failures? In Christ, almost incredibly, every failure will work for an ultimate good (Romans 8:28).
Do we feel weak and inadequate? In Christ God loves to choose the weak and foolish things because, when we are weak, he promises that his grace will be sufficient for us — so much so that we can learn to boast in our weaknesses because of how they showcase his strength (1 Corinthians 1:27–31; 2 Corinthians 12:9–10)
Do we feel insignificant and unimportant? In Christ we were chosen by God (John 15:16), who purposefully assigned us a unique and needed function in his body (1 Corinthians 12:18).
When we are anxious and depressed, we need a good word, we need God’s word, we need the good new of Jesus. More than that, we need to get our eyes on the God of the word and worship Him. Fear will turn to faith when worry turns to worship.
In His service,
Pastor Marco